Tuesday 11 August 2009

August.

02/08/09
So our friends come over Friday evening and I cooked a Thai meal, managed to get through the whole night easily, I drank four bottles of stellar so just over 2 pints. To be honest they weren’t or didn’t taste like, “god what have I been missing” they were just beers! And I drank them to be sociable. And I didn’t drink anything Saturday although I may have had a craving but I’m not sure? But I had my baclofen on me and took three to be on the safe side. Drove a lot over the weekend and that helped my partner out as she was always driving before I started baclofen. Since my reduction in dosage I feel much better and things have become much easier for me in regard to side effects. I can function normally again and feel totally confident in the treatment once more.

03/08/09
I was going to work today but I decided against it as I had loads of personal chores to do. Also I decided not to quit my sports trading and I’m going to keep going as I’m sure that’s where the money is??? I’ve got quite a lot on with a guy whose information products I’ve been selling for some years and that may really help financially. No beer today and no cravings.

04/08/09
I had a day off today but unfortunately my partner had no motor due to an electronic key problem so our plans stopped there, so a very quiet and uneventful day. No beer and had no cravings.

07/08/09
A quiet couple of days for me, been over at my partners generally taking it easy. Absolutely no beers and no cravings although one thing I have noticed is that I keep breaking out in cold sores. When I use to drink I use to get them as obviously I was running my body down but I never got them as bad as I get them now. Is it the baclofen and another side effect of them? I really think it is as I have never had them with such consistency; it’s got to the stage that as one is clearing up another one is appearing. My diet is good and I’m obviously not drinking yet something is causing these continuous outbreaks? Maybe my immune system is affected by the baclofen and this is causing the repeated occurrence of cold sores? Shall look into this. On 130 mg 50 mg in emergencies although I still haven’t used this.

11/08/09
I had a few more days off over the weekend not because I needed them just because I could take them. I didn’t do anything spectacular but I have enjoyed the free time. No beer at all and no cravings even though my partner drinks red wine regularly. It still amazes me that after all the years trying to cure my alcoholism I eventually done it using a drug that has been available for 30 years or more. I have enjoyed just not drinking and been sober considering for months ago I was stil
l an alcoholic.

14/08/09
So the weekend is upon us again and I really do notice how quick a week passes since I’ve been sober, or is it just me? My friend is doing a book signing in London on Saturday so we are going to that and then doing the London thing as my partner loves it, personally I don’t but I do enjoy showing my partner around. My nephew was due to come down today but unfortunately he has a bug and is out of action for a couple of days. Another 14 days have passed since my last beer and that’s when our friends come over from Canada and I cooked a Thai meal; I had four bottles of Stella to be sociable but could have easily gone without. Still on 130 mg, may look to reduce again very soon as I want to get to the minimum dose that keeps me abstinent, although I have been comfortable on this dose.


16/08/09
A good weekend, got up late on Saturday and then went to the pub to watch Chelsea, luckily they got a late goal and took the three points; all that beer around and I didn’t even fancy one, in fact it puts me off drinking seeing others do it, I honestly have totally changed my views on drinking altogether, I did not intend to aim for this it just happened? My partner and I worked out my average alcohol units consumed when I use to drink heavily, gold label is either 3.2 or 3.5 units of alcohol each can, some days I could drink eight, some days double that, so we averaged it to around 10 cans a day... So let’s be really conservative and account for the odd day I didn’t drink and say gold label is 3.0 units of alcohol each can. Obviously that equals 30 units a day or 840 units a month... Fucking ridiculous is what that is but amazingly I’m still here??? Now when I was drinking I never used a look at it like that because I didn't or couldn’t face the facts? All I knew is that I needed desperately to stop drinking but I just didn’t know how or even if I could. But if you’ve been reading my blog you will know I beat my alcoholism with baclofen, a good Dr., and determination... Oh, and last month I consumed all of 8 units.


20/08/09
I had taken the last three days off and I have been at my partners so no updates, although she has broadband as from yesterday so I can update as usual every evening. I have been suffering with a bit of a bug since the weekend, initially I thought it just a cold but it seems to be lingering, my partner is the same and we wondered if we had a bit of swine flu? Yesterday we went to a big health club/complex, I had a look at the kickboxing class but it was very basic; my partner went swimming and I was amazed how good her breast stroke was, obviously we have been swimming before but never in a gym where you just do lengths. I had a lot of anxiety yesterday and was close to taking my extra dose of baclofen although I didn’t. I don’t know where it come from? But I wasn’t as relaxed as normal. Its three weeks since my last drop of alcohol and no cravings since then, yesterday was the first day during those three weeks that I could [maybe?] Have reached for one when I was in the motor on the motorway, but honestly don’t think I could have let myself down that much; also I had some baclofen on me and took some there and then and that done the job, and I realized immediately just how much I do not need alcohol.


24/08/09
I have a virus... Bloody marvellous, do you remember I said I kept getting cold sores? I thought it to be the baclofen but I think my body has been lacking some good old vitamin C. I am diabetic and since I have stopped drinking I have been very partial to a bit off sugar thinking along the lines of, not drinking so sugar must be ok, bad mistake. All the sugar has been depleting any vit C I had in me and the cold sores were trying to tell me I was run down but I didn’t listen and I thought it another side affect of the Baclofen. So I think I have realised the cause of my cold sores and this virus??? And shall concentrate on getting my diet sorted.
My partner and I went to Portsmouth on Saturday, but I had a severe sore throat so we came back early. Sunday I was really rough and didn’t even watch the football. Obviously no beer and Friday marks 1 month alcohol free.


25/08/09
Still rough today although a bit better, a cough has come on though. During this virus i have still taken my baclofen regularly 130mg. If you read the posts you can see that Thistle is of the baclofen because she/he didn't think it a cure and didn't/couldn't handle the side effects, and I'm still on it because it's cured my addiction totally; horses for courses i suppose?

26/08/09
Coughed my balls of last night so not much sleep and kept my partner awake also, didn't feel great today but managed to go to supermarket. A good month work wise and some good stuff coming up to keep me financially optimistic. I'm going to see Chelsea play Saturday so hope I'm better by Friday and am i going to have a beer? I doubt it as i don't fancy it especially after feeling rough but you never know i suppose. Obviously no beers today and remember Friday is a month since my last drop and i have had no cravings during that period; So a chance to say thank you to my Dr for making this possible and prescribing me baclofen and Dr. A for making baclofen recognized as a solution for alcohol addiction; also thank you to everyone else that has read my blog and kept me going through the difficult patches and giving me a reason to be strong and keep blogging including those that have sent private emails and the good old Anonymous Dr. Thanks to my Mum for all the tears that eventually got through. My biggest thanks to my loving partner that has been my rock through it all and showed me that i really could do it, she has had faith in me when others only doubted me, and love that kept me going when i could have given up, and if she hadn't found that article all those months ago {March 2009} God only knows where I'd be ??? So thank you my dear ****** you are my life, my soul, my everything, XxXx.


27/08/09
Still rough so going to Dr's in the morning, shall report back the results.

31/08/09
Dr. done a couple of tests and seemed un phased by my illness so i guess I'm OK, or i hope i am as i still have this bug/virus??? Chelsea on Saturday and no beer... Amazing i still cant believe it myself actually. Quiet last couple of days and seriously wondering if this bug is just that or something else? As i cant remember ever having a cold/ virus this long and it's got me concerned.


10 comments:

  1. hey Chris, my comp is fried sorry for not being about, well im off the baclofen, and im starting to feel like myself again...thank god, im eating, my mood is almost back to normal, strenth has returned to my body well almost returned, something strange going on with my vision though, everything seems dreamy if that makes sense to you!! but on a positive note im not drinking WOOOOOFECKINGHOOOOOOO!!!! hope your all well, and did the good dr m enjoy his break??

    Thistle

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Chris, Thistle and others,

    Thanks, I had a good break. Didn't see a patient for almost 4 weeks (except for my wife who was stung by a bee on her lip). I am glad you are both not drinking and feeling well. How about the others who tried baclofen? Any support needed?

    M

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hi Thistle, Dr M, good to hear you're not drinking Thistle and glad you had a good rest Dr.
    A lady needs some advice but she cant manage to post but i believe she is getting some help in regard to that so have a look back.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Chris,thank you for email. Now I am at last up and running I am a lot happier. Progress so far - I am up to 40mg and the odd time 50. Feeling very slow, withdrawn even and sleeping at odd times very unusual for me as it would usually take a brick to knock me out. Things that would normally send me to the bottle are not doing that.In the past three days where I have every opportunity to drink I have switched from my normal drink and have had 40cl of Bacardi.I havent the same urge to go out and get it and really i think could do without. The fear of not sleeping is still there and as you can imagen a lot of pressure this week.Would be very grateful to Dr. for any help.Funny you said about cold sores I have the same problem at the moment and not a good time to have them.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi Chris, you are aware I am a woman but had so many problems with password this one worked so went with it. Still at 40 to 50m. Drank last night but again quantity down. This and the fact I am so much more relaxed is sufficent for me at the moment. I do not know how i would be without it. One week before I go home and would then be really grateful to Dr. as to how to progress.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi Sam, you are doing great, the Dr. should post soon and advise.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Chris, "If you read the posts you can see that Thistle is off the baclofen because he didn't think it a cure and didn't/couldn't handle the side effects, and I'm still on it because it's cured my addiction totally; horses for courses i suppose?" Im sorry but it is wrong to put your faith in a tablet that know one really knows anything about, god there has not even been any clinical trials done on this drug for the reasons we are taking them for, its not even licensed for these reasons!! side effects wise, i could not handle the muscle weekness nor the depresion any longer, i was a living zombie trapped in a baclifen cage and a Dr advised it was in my best intrests to come off the stuff. There is much more going on in a alcoholics mind, you have to ask why am i doing this to myself, what reasons do i have, has something happend in my life that has effected me to the point i cant no longer control my habbit! my alcoholism was born through panic attacks, and its in my opinion that one should be seeking help to find out answers as to why you are drinking in the first place ( in the alcoholic sense of the word) so really seeking out proffesional help is the way to go, if you dont address your problems out with alcohol what god damn chance do you have really come on!!!???

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am new to all of this but Thistle if nothing else baclofen seems to have opened your thoughts because now you are asking why you drank. While in a stupor from drink this probably would not have crossed your mind.For this reason I would deem taking Baclofen as a success. Your body has tolerated the abuse of alcohol from the sounds of it for many years and if I have to suffer the side effects then so be it.Because of msituation at present I cannot increse the dose but next week will be different. Situations I found myself in this week that would usually land me in lots of bother I have coped much better with. I have the feeling of being a little bit out of it now and then but not to the extent of the out of it madness that is alcohol.I worried when I read the blog Chris wrote as it was like he was closing a chapter I hope not as he was open about who is I feel safe while he is about.Thistle if all these PROFESSIONALS would give things a chance as they do with other illness we might have a chance but alcoholism is the dirty self inflicted disease that you must hide the same way as I hid the drink. Chris did not do this,he was open about who he is and what he was again major progress.I am not an unintelligent person and dont believe in magic cures I will work with it as I did with campral and all the rest and its a new hope to go forward with forward being the operative word.I cannot live the rest of my life like this. The professionals make appointments that take weeks upon weeks and their budget dries up in the meantime and its back to the off licence for the magic potion of oblivion and you get a free set of shakes, sickness and an invite to come back, no budget there.Chris please stick with us you have been a godsend and Dr.Anon your help is invalueable.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Sam, it never opened my eyes, my eyes have been very open since christmas! i think you miss the point of my post, i was not talking indirectly about myself, just in the generic sense. Sam if it works for you then fantastic, go for it! 3 weeks sobre i was yesterday, all off my own back no tablets, Zero help of any kind, a wise old man told me "its not the last drink that gets you drunk, its the first" some times its the simple things that make you think. i started drinking first off about 3 years ago now, was really to try and knock myself out as i could not sleep due to anxity attacks, and lack of sleep. I got to the point where i had enough and drink seemed like a good idea at the time, if i could go back in time, i would never in my wildest dreams went down the path i had chosen.

    "alcoholism is the dirty self inflicted disease that you must hide the same way as I hid the drink." Sam you need to help yourself before anyone else will, thats including the PROFESSIONALS!!!! Good luck with the Baclofen hope it works out for you. And your right Dr M's help on this subject is invaluable as is Chris's day to day account of things.

    ReplyDelete
  10. A question for Anonymous Dr. M,
    How does one go about finding a Dr. who will be willing to prescribe or at the least act as GP regarding Baclofen for me in Scotland (Glasgow) and /or Oslo (Norway?)

    I have been on baclofen for 6 mths increasing very slowly, with a few binges, but general successes now on 3.6 mg pr kg for 12 days 180 mg and now stepped down to (2.6 mg)as I find it too difficult to continue due to somnolence but FULL success with no craving -

    And on which platform may I provide my email to be contacted directly?
    Thanks and regards
    Boo

    ReplyDelete